Premarital Counselling
I offer premarital counselling for couples available online worldwide and in-person in Somerset, UK. My aim is to help you both build a marriage that is strong, intimate, and resilient from the very beginning. Together, we’ll explore how to communicate well, manage conflict, and align your values so you can face life as true partners. I also share relationship insights and practical advice on my YouTube channel, where over 20,000 subscribers tune in for guidance on building stronger relationships.
Getting it right from the start
Congratulations on your engagement! Your marriage, if given it’s proper care and attention, will be your boldest and most thrilling adventure. It will be your greatest source of joy and your steadfast refuge from the world, no matter what it throws at you over the course of your life. But it takes courage, commitment and effort to get it right. Let’s make sure you can do it well.
I believe that if the world was blessed with significantly more fulfilled, committed and loving married couples, many of humanities problems would be diminished. We would raise more stable children, build more cohesive communities, want for less of the earth’s resources and have the emotional fortitude to forge a kinder and more compassionate world.
Marriage can be either your greatest source of joy and pleasure, or a long, painful feat of endurance.
Engaged couples often pour months into planning the perfect wedding: the venue, the dress, the photographer. Even the font on the invitations and the first dance song are scrutinised. It is a once in a lifetime event, so of course every detail has to be just right. You even plan for the “what ifs”: What if it rains? What if it floods? You take out insurance to cover the risks.
Yet many couples are completely unprepared for the far bigger challenge: building a happy, lasting marriage. What does a truly fulfilling marriage look like? Where are your deal breakers? What happens if careers pull you apart for long stretches? What if sex fades for one of you, but not the other? What if a no go topic slowly becomes the very issue you cannot discuss without conflict?
These are common problems, and they are rarely solved without preparation and guidance.
We all know marriage can be challenging. In fact, research shows many couples struggle within the first few years. But those who invest in their relationship early through premarital counselling give themselves the best chance at a fulfilling, lifelong partnership. Perhaps even more tragically, a large proportion of those that do survive are far from happy. Even more sobering, many marriages that do survive the statistics aren’t truly happy. Far too many couples spend decades locked in patterns of bitterness, ambivalence, or quiet loneliness — sometimes without more than a handful of meaningful conversations across the years.
The enemies are familiar: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. John Gottman calls them the “Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.” They often creep in slowly, but once they take root, they are painfully hard to uproot.
The good news is that these challenges do not have to derail your future together. With the right preparation, couples can face them head on, strengthen their bond, and lay foundations that last for life. Premarital counselling is not about predicting every obstacle, but about giving you the tools, confidence, and clarity to handle whatever comes your way. That is where The Courageous Marriage programme comes in.
The Courageous Marriage
The Courageous Marriage is my new comprehensive 10 week online program. It is structured (loosely depending on your needs) and is comprised of 10 modules which we will work through together. The main topics will include:
- Your individual histories and how they might subconsciously affect your relationship.
- Your current relationship and any potential areas of difficulty.
- Core values and developing a shared vision for the future.
- Communication and conflict resolution.
- Sex and intimacy.
I am currently accepting a limited number of applications and the program will begin from January 2026. If you are interested in registering, please contact me and include your wedding date (if you have one), a little about both of you and how you met in your message. I would love to hear from you!
THE COURAGEOUS MARRIAGE ProgramA comprehensive 10 week premarital course
SaneFounded on truth, authenticity and certainty.
SexyBrimming with intimacy, playfulness & generosity.
SecureProtected by trust, commitment and loyalty.
£950 Online Only
Trust & Professional Standards
I provide therapy that is direct, practical, and solution-focused. Whether you want to strengthen your relationship or deal with personal challenges, we will work together to create lasting change.
Diploma in Counselling (UWE, 2011, BACP-accredited)
20+ years’ experience in mental health and therapy roles
Fully insured and working under regular professional supervision
Currently training in Psychosexual & Relationship Therapy
What are the benefits of marriage?
Benefits of Marriage on Physical Health
- Married people live longer and are less likely to commit suicide than those who are not married.
- Married people have better emotional and physical health than unmarried people.
- Married people have the lowest incidences of diseases such as diabetes, hypertension, and heart disease.
- Married men have lower levels of stress hormones.
- Those who are married report less depression than cohabiting couples.
- A study in 2016 found that married people have higher odds of surviving a heart attack.
- Other research has linked marriage with a lower risk of developing cancer and being diagnosed with dementia.
- Married cancer patients are more likely to survive the illness than those who are single and develop the disease. Death rates among unmarried cancer patients are higher, especially among single men.
- Married women are significantly less likely to be the victims of violent crime than single or divorced women.
Benefits of Marriage on Psychological Health
- Marriage provides partners with a sense of belonging.
- Married women experience less psychological distress.
- Married mothers feel more love and intimacy, less ambivalence, and experience less conflict with their husbands than cohabiting and single women do with their partners.
- Married mothers report less depression, more support from their partners, and more stable relationships than cohabiting mothers.
- Married people are least likely to commit suicide.
- Married people are much more likely to report being happy than cohabiters.
- Married mothers of infants have the most positive attitudes and report forming better home environments than single and cohabiting mothers.
Benefits of Marriage on Children
- Children with married parents have better emotional and physical health than those raised by single parents.
- Adolescents living with married parents are less likely to be depressed than those in stepfamilies or single-parent families.
- Children with married parents are more likely to stay in school and have fewer behavioural problems.
- Children with married parents are less vulnerable to serious emotional illness, depression and suicide.
- Children with married parents receive a model for their future marriage.
- Children from intact families are likely to have higher paying jobs as adults.
Benefits of Marriage on Finance
- Married people enjoy greater wealth than unmarried people, and the longer they stay married, the more their wealth accumulates.
- Married men earn more money than do single men with similar education and job histories.
- Married women are economically better off than divorced, cohabiting or never-married women.
Benefits of Marriage on Society
- Adolescents living with married parents are less likely to be depressed than those in stepfamilies or single-parent families.
- Married women are significantly less likely to be the victims of violent crime than single or divorced women.
- Being married changes people’s lifestyles and habits in ways that are personally and socially beneficial.
- Communities with more married-parent families will be safer and better places to live because they are less likely to by plagued by substance abuse and crimes committed by young people.
- Married people have better health than unmarried people and so societal healthcare costs are lower.
In premarital counselling, we’ll talk openly about communication and conflict resolution (see my approach), how to handle money, family, and intimacy, and how to create a shared vision for the years ahead.
Why it Matters
- Avoid years of resentment, loneliness, or silent endurance.
- Strengthen trust and deepen intimacy before small issues become big ones.
- Develop skills to handle the Four Horsemen; criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling before they can take root.
- Invest in your marriage as intentionally as you invest in your wedding.