Screen Addiction
When people come and see me nowadays, I’m having to ask questions that I didn’t have to ask before. And the question that I’m going to centre on today is “how is your screen usage?”. This was not a question I was asking people 20 years ago because screens had not emerged as the all-pervasive, all-consuming things that they are today.
So, in today’s article I’d like to talk about the impact of news, entertainment, and social media on mental health and what we can do as individuals, to distance ourselves from its impact so that we can live our lives more fully.
We’re all on our screens all the time. People can’t even go for a walk nowadays without scrolling on their phones. On more than one occasion I’ve been passed by walkers in the countryside listening to 24-hour news channels on loudspeaker. My husband actually saw a woman walk her pram directly into a lamp post whilst staring at her phone a couple of weeks ago. People don’t go for coffee and just talk to one another anymore. I’ve seen families, as I’m sure you have, dressed up and spending a fortune on eating out, only to sit across from one another staring at their phones in silence.
This new normal is tragic and disturbing.
Mindless Over-Saturation
And don’t be fooled by the look of urgent intent on their faces. They’re not looking at important notifications or last minute invitations to social events. They’re checking what a neighbour’s wife looks like in a bikini, how thin a work colleague is or nodding in agreement to a post about how ridiculous left wing people or right-wing people are. They’re watching footage of natural disasters on the other side of the planet or reading about the latest health scare, environmental catastrophe, disease or in what way the world is probably going to end this week.
Now, I’m not saying for a second that news or social media doesn’t have its place in the world. Of course, it does. And it is, of course, important to think about areas of life that could impact us all and what we might be able to do about it. But it’s the doing that matters, not just the knowing. Studies suggest that taking action on issues that are important to you can mitigate the distress they cause. Join or start a group that works towards fixing the issues you feel passionate about and you will feel more empowered and less helpless.
What I’m talking about here is the endless scrolling and the disconnect from our own lives that it creates.
I fear that this socially acceptable addiction, which is what it is, to news, entertainment and social media is playing a staggering role in the deterioration of our mental health, creativity, physical well-being and relational intimacy.
Something I ask my clients to do on a regular basis is to pay attention to people the next time they are out in a busy public space. And I’m inviting you to do this today. The next time you go out, either to the shops or for a walk, really look at people, really pay attention to their body language, to the way that they hold themselves.
What you might notice, is that a lot of people look sad and tense. They look downtrodden. They’re slow. There’s no bounce in their step. People don’t have a sort of head up shoulders back kind of look about them anymore. Moreover, a lot of people look physically unwell, pale and weak, like they aren’t moving enough or taking care of themselves properly.
And I’m not saying everybody of course, but what I am saying is that it does, sadly, appear to be a high proportion of people. There are obviously multiple factors at play here, but I’m convinced that the information pouring into people’s psyches via their devices is a significant, contributing factor.
Media As Abusive Force
So, I’ve started to regard news and social media as a sort of abusive force in the world, not too dissimilar to individual abusers. These people tend to isolate their victims from others and then ruin their sense of selves. They do this by using endless criticism and fear and by instilling a sense of hopelessness. They frighten their victims.
They may say things like:
“Compared to this other woman, you are ugly.” (Instagram)
“As long as you do what I tell you, everything will be fine.” (Politicians, News Readers)
“I have to hit you to get your attention.” (The News)
That’s all present, isn’t it, within the media now? We’re all examining ourselves in comparison to images of other people. And it’s coming at us rapid fire for some, particularly our children, all day, every day.
The endless doom and fear coming at us from the news. The topic changes, the situation changes, or the event or person that we’re supposed to be afraid of or hate changes. But the ever present point is, you are supposed to be afraid. And ashamed. And angry. And helpless.
Think about how an abuse victim suffers at the hands of a tyrant, how it changes their personality, how they might go from being a confident, independent person to feeling a crushing sense of anxiety, low mood, low confidence.
They may lose hope and faith in themselves, in others and in the world at large. Is that happening to us now? Have we become victims of a different kind of abuser? Has it been so insidious, this rise of information consumption that we haven’t noticed it happening? Could this be a reason so many people are suffering from disorders like anxiety, depression, addiction, dysmorphia or dysphorias?
Here is what Rutka Bregman has to say on the matter in his beautiful book, “Human Kind“.
“Imagine for a moment that a new drug comes on the market. It’s super addictive and in no time everyone’s hooked. Scientists investigate and soon conclude that the drug causes, I quote, a misperception of risk, anxiety, lower mood levels, learned helplessness, contempt and hostility towards others and desensitization. Would we use this drug? Would our kids be allowed to try it? Would government legalize it? To all of the above, yes, because what I’m talking about is already one of the biggest addictions of our times. A drug we use daily that’s heavily subsidized and is distributed to our children on a massive scale. That drug is the news. I was raised to believe that the news is good for your development. That as an engaged citizen, it’s your duty to read the paper and watch the evening news. That the more we follow the news, the better informed we are and the healthier our democracy. This is still the story many parents tell their kids, but scientists are reaching very different conclusions. The news, according to dozens of studies, is a mental health hazard.”
is Media Making Us Sick?
Are The News and Social Media contributing to the dependence we are seeing on prescription medication for mood disorders? Could this be a factor that plays a part in the fact that we’re drinking way too much? Are these attempts to deal with the pain that’s being caused, the fear and hopelessness that’s being instilled? Are we all deeply and fundamentally disturbed by the relentless onslaught of stories and images that are overwhelmingly negative? Are we less interested in truly connecting with one another, and looking after each another because we have come to fear, dislike, and mistrust each other?
According to multiple studies, which I link to the below, yes.
Excessive news and social media consumption increases anxiety, depression, anger, feelings of helplessness and can even cause PTSD. It triggers the limbic system, flooding the body with cortisol and adrenaline which deregulates your immune system, leaving you more susceptible to fatigue, illness and infections. It increases feelings of worry and distress and can cause us to believe that the world and our fellow humans are more hostile than they actually are. Overconsumption of media, rather than empowering us to make positive changes, actually lowers our ability to cope with real world problems.
So, this is serious, folks. We need to turn off the news, the endless forms of entertainment, and log off social media as much as we possibly can.
I’m not suggesting you need to quit entirely, but you do really need to consider how much news, entertainment, and media you are consuming. Consider what the intention of the media you are consuming is, and whether it might be impacting your health and the quality of your relationships.
A Return to Sanity
I think my clients would tell you that one of the things they love about seeing me the most is that I am really with them. I’m acutely conscious that they’re paying me for my quality attention, for me to really be with them. And I can’t do that if I am overwhelmed by meaningless information or if my head is lost to endless, frightening stories and images over which I have very little, if any control.
You know, with alcoholism, that you can’t drink your way through a day and be available and present for your children. Well, I would argue the same is true if your addiction is the news, mindless entertainment, or social media. If your attention is taken away most of the time, obsessing about every global event, or lost to hours of pointless Netflix shows, you might well end up disconnected and unavailable to your children, to your partner and to yourself.
How nourishing do you think watching celebrities dancing or baking cupcakes day after day really is? Do you think you will look back and think if only I watched just a little bit more of all that stuff? Or do you think in all seriousness that you might regret it? That you might think, in the final analysis, that you missed vast proportions of your quite frankly astonishing existence hooked on things that had very little to do with your life at all? That you perhaps might worry that you failed to properly connect to your children, to your partner, or to your own life?
This is particularly troubling where children are concerned. We know that insecure personality types are created by unavailable or inconsistent parenting, so there’s a very real possibility that we are creating a generation of emotionally neglected and insecurely attached children. So it really isn’t just our children’s screen use that we as parents should be monitoring and restricting, but also very much our own.
As the American psychologist Marshall B. Rosenberg wisely observed:
“Your presence is the most precious gift you can give to another human being.”
We don’t know how long we’re here for and we don’t know if we ever come back. So, it’s probably a good idea, don’t you think, that we all make the most of the time we have whilst we’re here.
Imagine how much more we could achieve in the world and how much richer our relationships might be if we were more available and less distracted and disturbed by our devices. Imagine if Lennon and McCartney were given smart phones instead of guitars. If Aristotle was intellectually satisfied by Twitter or if Van Goughs self-portraits were all taken on an iPhone. Imagine what could you achieve, in your career, in your marriage, with your kids or in your pursuits if you were more finely attuned and connected to your own reality?
What might we achieve as a species if we all took genuine responsibility as individuals for working out how to use these technologies responsibly and for positive ends?
Putting our screens down isn’t going to be easy, they are obviously hugely addictive to us. But, if they’re a problem for you currently, you can make some simple steps in the right direction today.
- Put your phone in the glove box when you arrive at the restaurant.
- Leave it at home when you go for a walk.
- Enforce a ‘no phones at the table’ or/and ‘no phones in the bedroom’ rule at home.
- Turn off notifications.
- Set App Time Limits.
- Turn your phone off at the same time everyday and leave it off.
- Notice when you unconsciously reach for your device and make a decision to leave it where it is.
Use screens the way a moderate drinker might choose to use alcohol. Mindfully, in moderation and with an awareness that too much is bad for your health.
Good luck, let me know what you think or how you get on in the comments, I do try to reply to as many as I can.
Tell the truth about where you are with media and with the news. Is it making you sick? Put the screens down for a while, your life will dramatically improve and so will the lives of the people you love. I promise. If you honestly find that you can’t stop, get help. Don’t lose another year or five wasting your precious life.
Look after yourselves. Pay attention to yourself and to those you love. Take the quality of your life seriously because you deserve that. We all do.
References:
Caught in a Dangerous World: Problematic News Consumption and Its Relationship to Mental and Physical Ill-Being https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/figure/10.1080/10410236.2022.2106086?scroll=top&needAccess=true
Media and mental health https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6198586/#:~:text=Effects%20on%20children%20of%20violence,that%20way%20to%20solve%20problems.
Association between screen time and depression among US adults https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5574844
