Welcome to my blog. Here I share honest, no-nonsense writing about relationships, intimacy, and mental health. My goal is simple: to give you tools, insights, and encouragement you can use in real life.
A Plea for Compassion If you’re a woman and you’re married to a generally good man, a kind, loving and devoted husband, but sex has been off the menu for some time, without consultation with or willing consent from him,…
Sex is an Emotional Need A fulfilling sex life is not a bi-product of a successful marriage, it’s a necessary component of one. It’s not a special treat, a reward for good behaviour or a bargaining chip for favour. It’s…
The Decline of Intimacy in Marriage You must have heard the old penny jar metaphor? The old folk tale that suggests that if a married couple were to put a penny in a jar for every sexual encounter during the…
A Holistic Approach to Relational Well-Being If we as human beings want to feel whole and fully alive, then we need to tend to every aspect of our health as individuals. In my view this includes, amongst other things, our…
Lack of Effort in Relationships At the heart of most of the problems I encounter in my work with married couples, is a fundamental lack of individual effort when it comes to meeting each other’s reasonable needs. It doesn’t really…
A ‘Hopeless’ Marriage? I’ve been inundated with comments on YouTube from people married to what they would describe as hopelessly uncaring spouses. Lost causes. They tell me they’ve done everything they possibly can to be a loving partner but that despite…
A Shared Vision for Your Relationship Is your relationship on the right track? Is your it where you hoped it would be when you first started dating? Is the division of labour in your household fair? Is your spending under control? Are…
Screen Addiction When people come and see me nowadays, I’m having to ask questions that I didn’t have to ask before. And the question that I’m going to centre on today is “how is your screen usage?”. This was not…
Men & Women are Different One of the most common complaints I hear about men from their wives is that they’re not as emotionally available or present as their wives would like them to be. And in my experience, even…
Are Women High Maintenance? I received a comment on my YouTube channel a few days ago in response to a video about unmet needs that cause men to withdraw from their wives. It read: “Hey guys. You want unconditional love, respect,…