Generosity is the Antidote to Withholding A frequent problem I hear when couples come to see me is that neither partner treats the other in the positive, generous or loving way they used to when they first met. Relationships that…
How Women Can Help Their Husbands TO Become More Present The number one complaint I hear from wives when they come to couples counselling with their husbands, is that their husband has become distant or detached, and that he no…
How do you react when your partner complains about something you’ve said or done? Do you feel attacked and want to fight back or bring up something they did in the past? Or do you feel overwhelmed, injured and unable…
Are You a Good Partner? Everyone wants a good partner. Are you one? What would your partner say? There seems to be a lot of talk nowadays about bad partners. Everybody seems to have one. No good women, no good…
“Challenges are what make life interesting, and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.” – Joshua J. Marine Investigating Problems Consistently and skilfully explore the problems you have as a couple and as individuals together, as they arise. If you…
“What comes easy won’t last long, and what lasts long won’t come easy.” — Francis Kong The End of The Honeymoon PHASE When it comes to our physical health, we know that prevention is better than cure. We know that…
A Love Story. Learning the Art of Self-Regulation. “We are born in relationship, we are wounded in relationship, and we can be healed in relationship.” – Harville Hendrix Dysfunctional childhoods often lead to emotional dysregulation in children and adults. Conversely,…
“If you see something beautiful in someone, speak it.” ― Ruthie Lindsey Love is Action It seems to me; most people nowadays think that happy couples are somehow lucky. That they perhaps managed to find ‘the one’ and that the seemingly…
“The search for a scapegoat is the easiest of all hunting expeditions.” ― Dwight D. Eisenhower My parents told us, my sister, brother and I, that they were getting a divorce when I was eleven years old. My world immediately fell…
In his research into what made marriages stable and what led to relationship collapse, Gottman thought he had worked it out when he concluded that teaching couples how to argue without being overridden by the four horsemen was the answer.…